| Stage | Level | XP | Unlockers | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
 |
Not today! | 1 | 100 | 157 |
 |
Chaos is a Ladder | 5 | 500 | 2222 |
 |
A game gives a player his own name? | 4 | 400 | 105 |
 |
The things I do for love! | 3 | 300 | 222 |
 |
Stick it with the pointy end! | 2 | 200 | 559 |
 |
You know nothing! | 1 | 100 | 4467 |