| Game |
Achievement |
Points |
 |
 |
Swirlie Swan Song |
0.90 |
| What did the last guy eat, rubber cement?! Awarded for flushing the toilet in Lefty's bathroom. |
|
 |
Yankmaster |
1.46 |
| You’ve always loved to yank the ol’ handle! Awarded for hitting a jackpot on any slot machine. |
|
 |
Thank You, Sir. May I Have Another? |
1.21 |
| S’way to go! You’re the living embodiment of the word “tipsy!” Drink ten drinks in a row at Lefty's. |
|
 |
No Boundaries |
1.19 |
| You’ll tell anyone, anything - especially a recorded female. Awarded for taking the phone sex quiz. |
|
 |
The Old and The Hopeless |
1.17 |
| You’re showing your age, Larry. That company has been gone a long time! Awarded for dialing 1-209-683-6858 on the payphone. |
|
 |
Safe Citizen |
0.96 |
| It’s the next best thing to having yourself spayed or neutered! Awarded for wearing a lubber before having sex with the Hooker. |
|
 |
Pretty (Gross) Woman |
0.96 |
| You’ve passed a milestone; be sure to tell all your friends. Awarded for having sex with the hooker while wearing a lubber. |
|
 |
You Love This Game! |
0.88 |
| Hmm. This looks just different enough to avoid a lawsuit! Awarded for getting a good look up close at the Angry Broads arcade cabinet. |
|
 |
Cheapskate Ladykiller |
1.48 |
| You used the fewest cab rides to get to the endgame! How attractively budget-minded of you! Awarded for getting to Eve’s Penthouse with only seven taxi rides. |
|
 |
Secret Agent Man |
1.45 |
| Keep this up and you’ll need a talented-but-undisciplined young sidekick! Awarded for chewing your way through the bungee cords in the Honeymoon Suite. |
|
 |
Credit Watcher Extraordinaire |
1.34 |
| Didja see yourself? Didja? Huh? Your name was number 8,612! Awarded for giving the coveralls to the Apple Man before purchasing an apple from him. |
|
 |
Something to Tell the Grandkids |
1.15 |
| She has three orifices. You were bound to find at least one! Awarded for using the zipper on the patched love doll. |
|
 |
Hey, Is This Yours? |
1.31 |
| Maybe Adam doesn’t need Olga right now, but he could later, when the money’s gone and spending ends, and they don’t come ’round no more. Awarded for showing the love doll to Adam at Studio 69. |
|
 |
Yes! Yes! Yes! |
1.19 |
| You are so proud. Now don’t tell anyone how you did it! Awarded for turning off the bubbles in Eve’s hot tub. |
|
 |
Is That All There is? |
1.31 |
| Congratulations! You’ve now heard every joke this comedian knows. |
|
 |
I Can Walk the Walk! |
1.31 |
| Congratulations! You found every possible star on the Larrywood Walk of Shame! Thanks to each of them for Kickstartering us. |
|
 |
Is This Something To Be Proud of? |
1.48 |
| Congratulations! You found every possible way to die in this game. Every last one. What would your Mom say? |
|
 |
Fiscally Responsible |
1.28 |
| Congratulations! You played the entire game without going broke. You never were one to rely on the kindness of strangers! |
|
 |
Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On |
1.44 |
| Congratulations! You used the vibrator on every possible person in the game. Shared pain is lessened, shared joy is increased. That’s why we’re here. |
|
 |
Order of the White Pants |
1.20 |
| Congratulations! You finished the game without once getting peed on by the dog! See? Staying a moving target is not just important in FPS’s. |
|
 |
Cable Svengali |
0.86 |
| Have you considered a career as a programming executive? Awarded for hypnotizing the Pimp with the television. |
|
 |
Tool Grabber |
0.89 |
| You’re taking “dumpster diving” quite literally, Larry! Awarded for retrieving the hammer by falling from the fire escape into the dumpster. |
|
 |
That’ll Do, Pig |
0.90 |
| You’re ahead of the game when you can tell the slop from the glop! Awarded for earning the hot sauce by finding all hidden objects at the Buffet. |
|
 |
Enabler of the Year |
0.87 |
| Real nice. And the ulterior motive just makes it worse. Awarded for giving a box of wine to the bum and receiving the pocket knife. |
|
 |
Lubber Band |
0.89 |
| Well, well. That wasn’t the least bit embarrassing! Awarded for buying a condom at the Come ‘n’ Go store. |
|
 |
Not With My Whale, You Don’t! |
0.98 |
| Nice going, Ahab! Now we have to say “Some cartoon animals were injured in the making of this game.” Awarded for pouring the hot sauce into the whale’s blowhole. |
|
 |
Making Friends Everywhere You Go |
0.99 |
| You have such a gentle touch with that discarded syringe. Awarded for extracting the civet from the cat. |
|
 |
Frontier Pharmacist |
1.00 |
| At least you had the good sense to only make one bottle! Complete the creation of eau d’ Larry. |
|
 |
Unexpected Disco Stud |
0.94 |
| Who knew? She seemed so sweet. Awarded for dancing with Fawn at Studio 69. |
|
 |
We Would’ve Brought a Gift |
0.95 |
| But it was all so fast! That was the shortest engagement on record! Awarded for marrying Fawn at the Weddin’ Ready chapel. |
|
 |
Law and Order: Lost Wages |
0.99 |
| Congratulations, brave adventurer! You have graduated to full-scale breaking and entering! Get the pills from Lefty's window. |
|
 |
Law and Order: Lost Wages II |
1.00 |
| This is your second major act of criminal trespass! Way to go! Awarded for entering Adam's penthouse. |
|
 |
Handy to Have Around the House |
1.01 |
| You can fix anything! What woman wouldn’t love a guy like you? (Answer: All of them!) Awarded for patching up the love doll. |
|
 |
Defying Physics |
1.01 |
| Don’t try this at home. It requires a dramatic license! Awarded for using the patched love doll to float across the chasm. |
|
 |
Oh. My. God. |
1.01 |
| You did it. You not only got laid, but you’ve found true love. (Maybe.) Awarded for giving the apple to Eve. |
|
 |
Urine Luck! |
0.90 |
| Did you bring a fresh white leisure suit? Awarded for getting peed on by the dog. |
|
 |
Busted! |
1.13 |
| You big show-off! Correction: You show-off! Awarded for wearing the lubber outdoors. |
|
 |
Nuclear Crotch |
1.01 |
| Unprotected sex? In the ’80s, Larry? Seriously? Awarded for having sex with the hooker without using a lubber. |
|
 |
Mugger Mayhem |
0.72 |
| You always did consider yourself a lover and not a fighter. Awarded for getting beaten up by the mugger. |
|
 |
Road Rash |
0.94 |
| “Somebody get the scraper!” Awarded for getting run down by a speeding vehicle. |
