| Game |
Achievement |
Points |
 |
 |
POG Champ! |
1.51 |
| You own the sickest slammer! Holograms and everything! |
|
 |
Happy Family! |
1.48 |
| Your Mom and Dad still have an active sex life! |
|
 |
Hot pocket! |
1.54 |
| You were cooked alive in a malfunctioning incubator. |
|
 |
The Blood of Christ |
2.59 |
| Tastes delicious! |
|
 |
Irresponsible Parents |
2.59 |
| You didn’t know the dog wasn’t supposed to eat chocolate. |
|
 |
Poor Investment |
1.52 |
| Your parents spent your college fund on Beanie Babies hoping to make millions. |
|
 |
Pet Cemetery |
1.73 |
| Sometimes...DEAD IS BETTAH! |
|
 |
Future Serial Killer! |
2.59 |
| You’ve always looked good in red! |
|
 |
Angry Video Game Nerd |
1.56 |
| You spend your life playing and reviewing shitty games so other people don’t have to. |
|
 |
Warm Popsicle |
1.67 |
| Why don’t you come downstairs and have yourself a Popsicle? |
|
 |
But I don’t even believe in Jeebus! |
2.59 |
| Just repent on your death bed! |
|
 |
In The Ghetto! |
2.59 |
| It’s the hard knock life! |
|
 |
Tears From Heaven |
1.79 |
| You've experienced every dead baby scenario...Yikes |
|
 |
Participant Trophy |
2.59 |
| Everyone is sooo special! |
|
 |
I Don’t Want To Grow Up! |
1.73 |
| Experience every happy child scenario. Lucky you. |
|
 |
Psychiatrist's Wet Dream |
1.73 |
| Experience every sad child scenario. Oh, BOO-HOO! |
|
 |
Early Warning Signs |
1.65 |
| Experience every angry child scenario and grow up to be Macaulay Culkin. |
|
 |
Forever Young |
1.84 |
| Experience every child death scenario. Sometimes dreams do come true! |
|
 |
Pills! Pills! Pills! |
2.59 |
| Pills! Pills! Pills! |
|
 |
D.A.R.E |
2.59 |
| What's better than not doing drugs? Doing drugs. |
|
 |
Better Red Than Dead! |
1.58 |
| Having a soul is overrated. |
|
 |
Smells Like Teen Spirit! |
1.73 |
| Experience every happy teen scenario. You were born way ahead of your time, man. |
|
 |
Everybody Hurts |
1.69 |
| Experience every sad teen scenario. Mother do you think they'll drop the bomb? |
|
 |
Rage Against The Machine |
1.73 |
| Experience every angry teen scenario. Life is only pain. |
|
 |
Darwin Award Nominee |
1.77 |
| Experience every teen death scenario. Texting is thinning the herd! |
|
 |
Guns Don’t Kill People, People With Guns Kill People |
2.59 |
| You can take my guns from my cold dead hands! |
|
 |
Margaritaville! |
1.86 |
| Experience every happy adult scenario. Why would anyone have kids!? |
|
 |
Being an Adult is Sad Enough |
1.81 |
| Experience every sad adult scenario. Your soul is thoroughly crushed. |
|
 |
Which Radical Movement is Right for You? |
1.77 |
| Experience every angry adult scenario. They took your stapler, now burn this place to the ground! |
|
 |
Join a Cult That Worships Blue Oysters |
1.86 |
| Experience every adult death scenario. Don't fear the reaper! |
|
 |
Nothing Better Than a Fiber Rich Diet |
1.95 |
| Experience every happy old scenario. You call that a no wiper! |
|
 |
Country Kitchen Buffet is Closed |
1.86 |
| Experience every sad old scenario. What's the point in living?! |
|
 |
Get Off My Lawn! |
1.79 |
| Experience every angry old scenario. Damn kids! |
|
 |
Hello Darkness, My Old Friend |
1.73 |
| Experience every old death scenario. What sound does silence make anyways? |
|
 |
In The Not Too Distant Future |
2.59 |
| At least you still have all those red sweaters! |
|
 |
Jet Fuel Can’t Melt Steel Beams |
1.64 |
| 9/11 was an inside job. |
|
 |
Riggity Riggity Wrecked Son! |
1.55 |
| You went back to the carpet store AFTER surviving cancer? |
|
 |
When I Die and They Lay Me To Rest |
2.59 |
| Experience Every Outcome in Womb Room |
|
 |
One Life To Live |
1.38 |
| Experience your first death outside the Womb Room |
|
 |
Massacre |
1.67 |
| Die 50 times in Womb Room |
|
 |
Living Hell |
1.75 |
| Die 100 times in Womb Room |
|
 |
Masochist |
2.37 |
| Die 1,000 times in Womb Room |
|
 |
Life is Meaningless |
2.59 |
| Die 10,000 times in Womb Room |
