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24.2 hours playing time on record

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Game Achievement Points Unlocked
Door Mat Door Mat 0.87 07/20/2020 18:08:15
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog 0.61 07/20/2020 17:54:50
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Planet of the Apes: The Musical Planet of the Apes: The Musical 1.40 07/20/2020 17:52:09
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
FAB-U-LOUS! FAB-U-LOUS! 0.89 07/19/2020 21:25:44
Wore all three outfits.
John Rambo'd! John Rambo'd! 1.17 07/19/2020 21:16:39
Made a very long killing spree.
OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale 0.79 07/17/2020 18:13:13
Roasted 30 people with fire.
Thanks for the money! Thanks for the money! 1.03 09/22/2017 20:51:18
Finished all seven days.
I swear, I thought it was a home fill I swear, I thought it was a home fill 0.99 09/22/2017 20:50:02
Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Rick Grimes 4 Life Rick Grimes 4 Life 1.04 09/22/2017 20:17:58
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Darth Maul'd! Darth Maul'd! 0.92 09/22/2017 20:11:17
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This! Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This! 0.85 09/22/2017 17:57:21
Killed over 1,000 people.
Screw Bill Lumbergh! Screw Bill Lumbergh! 0.90 09/22/2017 17:29:24
Survived Saturday.
Can't Touch This Can't Touch This 0.86 09/22/2017 17:02:47
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
It's sterile and I like the taste It's sterile and I like the taste 0.54 09/22/2017 16:11:57
Sucked down your own piss.
Workin' for the Weekend Workin' for the Weekend 0.83 09/22/2017 15:58:35
Survived Friday.
GOOD MORNING VIETNAM! GOOD MORNING VIETNAM! 0.81 09/22/2017 15:57:46
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Sheriff Arpaio would be proud. Sheriff Arpaio would be proud. 0.73 09/22/2017 15:11:25
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays 0.78 09/22/2017 15:01:09
Survived Thursday.
Where's Mr. McGibblets? Where's Mr. McGibblets? 0.82 09/22/2017 14:44:09
Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
I'm not even supposed to be here today! I'm not even supposed to be here today! 1.06 09/22/2017 14:30:03
Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT! OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT! 0.69 09/22/2017 00:12:41
Survived Wednesday.
Paid the Piper Paid the Piper 0.94 09/21/2017 23:24:35
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
C U Next Tuesday C U Next Tuesday 0.61 09/21/2017 22:12:09
Survived Tuesday.
I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you 0.54 09/21/2017 21:50:27
Put out someone that's on fire.
Officer McLovin' Officer McLovin' 0.49 09/21/2017 21:28:19
Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Someone's got a case of the Mondays! Someone's got a case of the Mondays! 0.44 09/21/2017 21:26:30
Survived Monday.
Finkle IS Einhorn! Finkle IS Einhorn! 0.60 09/21/2017 21:24:34
Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Friend of Dorothy Friend of Dorothy 0.38 09/21/2017 21:14:31
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Do you even Enzyte, bro? Do you even Enzyte, bro? 0.66 09/21/2017 21:05:41
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Here, Wilfred Here, Wilfred 0.47 08/03/2017 12:00:30
Gained your first dog helper.
Taxidermy with Chuck Testa Taxidermy with Chuck Testa 0.46 06/02/2014 10:30:12
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
There's always money in the banana stand There's always money in the banana stand 1.04 06/02/2014 10:29:26
Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Duck Dynasty Duck Dynasty 0.42 06/02/2014 10:22:30
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
R. Kelly's Protege R. Kelly's Protege 0.34 06/02/2014 10:16:47
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Well, aren't YOU a badass Well, aren't YOU a badass 0.40 06/02/2014 09:54:25
Kicked open a door.

Locked achievements

Game Achievement Points
Chapelle's Show Chapelle's Show 1.01
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Michonne ain't got nothin' on me Michonne ain't got nothin' on me 1.29
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Cesar Millan is Very Happy Cesar Millan is Very Happy 1.18
Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Rebecca Black's Nightmare Rebecca Black's Nightmare 1.02
Totaled 30 cars.
Hello, Newman Hello, Newman 1.22
Kicked 30 dogs.
Reddit would be proud. Reddit would be proud. 1.02
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Pussy on a Pedestal Pussy on a Pedestal 1.20
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace 0.83
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Uncle T-Bag Uncle T-Bag 1.22
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Running With Scissors Running With Scissors 1.03
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree 0.79
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Lieberman is our Leader! Lieberman is our Leader! 0.64
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Fear and Loathing Fear and Loathing 1.30
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Señor Cornballer Señor Cornballer 1.07
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Anustart! Anustart! 1.39
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
40 Year Old Virgin 40 Year Old Virgin 1.42
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
CAN YOU DIG IT?! CAN YOU DIG IT?! 1.45
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Scientology Level: OT VIII Scientology Level: OT VIII 1.51
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Fur Sure! Fur Sure! 0.68
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Anger Management With Roger Clemens Anger Management With Roger Clemens 1.05
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Shiva Blast Shiva Blast 1.03
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Don't taze me, bro! Don't taze me, bro! 1.19
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
I Am Legend I Am Legend 1.02
Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
I should buy a boat I should buy a boat 1.07
Read the newspaper every day.
It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway 0.65
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
I don't need virgins for this I don't need virgins for this 1.13
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
A-Rod Who? A-Rod Who? 1.07
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Chuck Norris'd! Chuck Norris'd! 0.91
Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
One time, at band camp... One time, at band camp... 1.14
Saved the marching band from explody death.
SCREW that game! SCREW that game! 1.28
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Found 'em faster than GWB Found 'em faster than GWB 1.07
Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Gotta pay the Troll Toll Gotta pay the Troll Toll 0.83
Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Gary vs. The K. Man Gary vs. The K. Man 1.33
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
You are not alone You are not alone 0.98
Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Achievement Stats 1.22
Executed 4 queries
687.37 KiB memory usage
20 crawler available

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